Halo 3: ODST

Here it goes again…

Looks like Bungie’s done it again; they’ve cranked out another Halo title, dubbing this one “Halo 3: ODST,” which is short for “Orbital Drop Shock Trooper.” Its all over twitter, IGN, and every game site ever. I personally LOVE it when Bungie releases a new game for Xbox, because I, as one of the few who don’t own an Xbox, get to bash the game to bits based on advertising, public appearance, trailers, and whatever dirt I can dig up on it. This is not a review, mind you. This is just me being absolutely mean to a company that likes to beat dead horses for so long that they might as well be beating a bag of decomposing manure.


Ok. I’ve seen the “GROUNDBREAKING TRAILER!” everyone is talking about. It involves a metropolan city being bombarded by what look like mechanical asteroids, shortly followed by a thunderstorm and several thousand search parties. At this point, an asteroid opens up, some guy gets out and looks heroic, and then runs into the shadows as aliens march by, apparently incredibly focused on maintaining exactly 3 feet apart from each other, while still trying to appear haphazard.


And here’s the best part; according to the site…

You are an Orbital Drop Shock Trooper. Your orders: Stay alive, meet up with your scattered squad, and escape the embattled city.

So… why were you launched into the city in the first place? I mean, hell, whoever launched you would have been better off just substituting those neat little drop pods for giant rocks and obliterating half the city. And there were hundreds of those stupid pods. I’m to believe that once you land, randomly, in a city, you’re to find your way to a select GROUP of these troopers? I can almost imagine running into another human in all the rubble… “Hey, sup. You from Bravo squad? No? A’ight, cool. Cya.” And why would the omnipotent, god-like leader of the “marines” choose to launch people into a city, only to tell them to ‘rough it out until you can sneak out quietly”?

The city, according to the site, was taken over by aliens- sorry, i meant “Covenant forces” some time ago, and you’re eventually supposed to reclaim the city (which you already pretty much totaled by launching hundreds of large asteroids into the city). But… isn’t that almost exactly like every other mission in any other Halo game? You’re either destroying aliens on THEIR planets or on ours. I really wish Bungie would stop beating the crap out of the dead Halo horse long enough to think of a better idea. Yeah, sure, Halo 1 was epic, Halo 2 added some more stuff on, and Halo 3, while refusing to make the computer players any less pants-on-head retarded, was actually quite fun. But its nothing new. At all. I know Bungie is trying to secretly hype up their new ‘project,’ Halo: Reach, but as of right now, the trailer consists of earth being blown to bits. Or something along those lines at least.

Overall, don’t expect me to praise a game I haven’t played, but don’t expect me to like it if the things you’ve been jamming down my throat are monotonous and status-quo. Sorry, Bungie, but this game seems to be something I won’t really appreciate until I end up at the house of a Halo fanboy (which, I can’t say will be much fun either, because he’ll already be good at the game while I’m still getting my feet wet).


Sorry about that Bungie… I just have to do that from time to time to vent off some steam. I’m sure if I had an Xbox I’d be as addicted as everyone else.

  • http://christophetran.info Christopher

    I feel the same way…gotta get meself an xbox.

    • http://www.technoheads.org Salem

      I’m glad SOMEONE agrees with me :D

  • http://dailyhero.fragrush.com Themecreator

    I got Wii :)

    Anyways, even if the story in the trailer is kinda confusing, the graphic is awsome ^^,
    And for us who haven’t played halo 1, halo 2 or halo 3, this game seemed quite fun… First time you are not master cheif or that other guy… (i think)

  • http://www.dscomic.com Rob

    Ah, for shooter games like this, who bothers with plausibility? The stories never make sense – you’re just in the game to run and shoot aliens, and that’s the fun of it all.

    • http://www.technoheads.org Salem

      Sadly, my tastes have been tainted by such games as Half Life 2 and Bioshock… at this point, I expect a certain degree of impressiveness to the games I play. While Bioshock has its chilling atmosphere and creative gameplay antics, and Half Life 2 has its incredible plot and gorgeous graphics and physics engines, Halo 3 simply has nothing compared to even, say, Halo 1. While I agree that the game may be fun in general, it doesn’t have that captivating quality that I expect from ‘great’ games. Call me a critic, but what else can I say?

  • http://twitter.com/technoheads salem

    I just want to test the new Disqus commenting feature.

  • Rudy Hayes

    Hey! Great Review. However, I think you could get more info out to your users by talking to Maddy tomorrow, she seems to know a lot about Halo – there's something to be said for the liberty to say what you like in this world. There's nothing to worry about though, I'm know people appreciate your efforts to stay with what you believe in and will stand by you no matter what goes wrong with the game. If all else fails, you can always use the secret communication cheat code youve been using, or perhaps a more unorthodox methodology? Either way, I recommend talking it through with Maddy, she'll make sure youre set straight. Otherwise, great guy, great site, seems as though youve put a lot of work into this, dont give up now, everyone here supports ya!

    • technoheads

      Thanks… this might be the nudge i need. I've been struggling with the site
      for a while… and I kinda hope it pulls through, but right now, things are
      pretty up in the air. Thanks, Rudy…. i've a lot of thinking to do though.

      • Rudy Hayes

        Well no worries, I'll follow you here for any new updates. Oh and just remember that equation I sent you before… make sure you solve it, and then do it again about a thousand times, just so the meaning gets across :D

  • Rudy Hayes

    Oh and BTW, I've heard about your possible lawsuits… I'm going to write them a letter, see if anything can be done. Hopefully you can prevent any action on their part until Saturday. I doubt it will do anything, but I've got a proposition for them (and you) that they might be interested it. More info later…

  • Rudy Hayes

    Oh and BTW, I've heard about your possible lawsuits… I'm going to write them a letter, see if anything can be done. Hopefully you can prevent any action on their part until Saturday. I doubt it will do anything, but I've got a proposition for them (and you) that they might be interested it. More info later…